When my perfectionism makes me unhappy

When my perfectionism makes me unhappy


"Often perfectionist and effective people

forget the importance of efficiency "

(Ismael Diaz Lazaro)


You have probably already been with perfectionists. The behavior they have seems curious and sometimes amusing.

Perfectionists need to achieve perfection in everything they do.

At breakfast, the cup should not be shifted slightly to the right. They need it in the center, perfectly positioned. A perfectionist mind can reach such extremes.

Why am I a perfectionist?

Many factors can lead you to develop a perfectionist personality.

Moreover, the perfectionist is recognized as a syndrome called "Perfectionist Syndrome", or "Obsessive Personality Disorder".

Some experts consider that perfectionism may be due to a genetic predisposition.

On the contrary, for other experts, the most likely cause of perfectionism is a variety of environmental factors:

  • Your self-esteem depends on the amount of compliments you make others.
  • You were humiliated during your childhood and today, you want to be accepted socially.
  • Your parents have been very authoritarian.
  • You grew up surrounded by successful peoplebut you could not have the same success as they did.
  • You tolerate very little failure.
  • You are aware that the company is highly competitive.

Since our birth, we are exposed to continuous stimulation that will mark us for the rest of our lives.

If you have experienced one of the situations mentioned above, then that necessarily had its consequences.

The society in which we live has its norms, its laws, its modes, its way of seeing life, and pushes us to be better than others.

Being someone who fails is not well seen. Society considers that true happiness lies in success.

But, can we really live under such pressure? That's when perfectionism begins to be a problem.


"Achieving success means learning to go from failure to failure without losing hope"

(Winston Churchill)


Perfection does not make me better

Being good in everything, doing things right and not going out of the way, does not make you better. Think, for example, that the more you strive to be a perfect person, the less you are.

People are not perfect, and we must see our imperfections as something that makes us unique.

Only by embracing imperfection can perfect happiness be attained. It is not by forcing oneself to be someone that we are not that we will succeed in being happy. Such behavior will only frustrate and stress us.

What can the everyday life of a perfectionist look like? First of all, a perfectionist person constantly has low self-esteemso that even the compliments that others can give him do not allow him to feel good about himself.

Guilt, pessimism and obsession are three words that define it perfectly.Indeed, she will never get what they want, since absolute perfection can not be achieved.

As a result, she often becomes depressed in spite of herself, and disappointments and other frustrations follow one another.


The perfectionist person becomes very little flexible and just as spontaneous.She is no longer natural, and becomes someone rigid, without any charm.


Like many other syndromes, perfectionism can be overcome. For this, the person must be aware that such an attitude will not help him achieve happiness.

Since she is aware that this frantic quest for perfection is none other than the fruit of the pressure to which she is subjected, she will then be ready to take the step towards acceptance.

We must all learn to be better, but without trying to reach this terrible perfection.

We must embrace the imperfection and give everything we have to do things the best we canbut without stubbornly reaching for something that in reality is not within our reach.

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