The inner child is made up of feelings that linger from our experiences in childhood. These are the lessons we learned as a child and which we can not get rid of, the desires that we had as children and that persist deep inside us.
Why is it so important to know him?
Good feelings bring good habits, necessary for success as adults, but negative feelings can be destructive and interfere in our adult life.
Working hand in hand with our inner child can help us identify the causes of these negative patterns, understand what has happened and heal from those old wounds that continue to hurt us.
Forging a healthy inner child, with our adult personality allows us to achieve a certain emotional balance and with it, inner peace.
How do we know if our inner child is hurt?
Almost all of us, in our childhood, experienced an event that marked our way of thinking and acting. As Thérèse J. Borchard says in his article6 Steps to Help Your Inner Child Heal (6 steps to help your inner child heal) "it is very likely that our parents were also bruised children. "
The same can be said of our teachers, our grandparents, our uncles and aunts, and other adults who were able to participate in our education.
However, the goal of healing your inner child is not to designate culprits, but to accept what may have happened and take control of what is affecting our lives today.
The consequences of the repression of our inner child
Here are some of the consequences of indifference to your inner child: not being able to relax or cope with stress, taking yourself too seriously, feeling guilty about not being well enough, having tendency to isolate yourself, etc.
These habits are the product of irrational beliefs of our inner child, such as "I would never be important enough for dad to stop drinking". Once you identify these beliefs, you can replace them with realistic truths: "Dad made bad decisions, but today I can avoid them."
Reliving the pain that some of these memories produce is a heartbreaking process. As a child we felt responsible for everything that happened in our home and we were unable to understand that maybe the problems of our parents had no connection with our person.
It is only by realizing that we are just children, and that we can not do anything at this time to change things, that we can succeed in freeing ourselves from that misplaced guilt that the trauma left and starting, finally, to cultivate our self-esteem.
Although it may be difficult to deal with your old wounds of the past, do not run away, it's worth fighting against.
A healthy inner child
After consoling and healing your inner child, he will become an innocent, inquisitive, simple, playful and joyful person who can be a true ally to enjoy life and develop your creativity.
Once your inner child is healed, you can fully assume the role of father / mother against him. As a loving and caring father / mother does, you can concede some desires to play your inner child, spend an entire afternoon laughing and having a good time.
If the old thoughts of your inner child resurface, reaffirm the value of this child to calm them down.
Photo credits: Ben Raynal