Helping others is one of the behaviors that enjoys great social recognition. In general, when we are altruistic, we improve the life of the other person. That's why in social terms it's one of the most rewarded ways to act. However,is it always a good thing to help others?The existence of the savior's syndrome seems to put this idea into question.
The savior's syndrome is a psychological condition that makesa person constantly feels the need to help others.This way of being causes the individual to act a little extreme and his actions can even become very harmful.
In this article we will try to understand what this way of being is. You will be able to identify it at home and among other people.And you can also avoid situations where help can become very harmful to others.
What is the Savior Syndrome
According to the official definition, a person suffering from the savior syndromeconstantly feels the need to save others.These people often tend to seek out individuals who need help and assistance and even sacrifice their own needs, desires and aspirations.
The problem is thatthese characteristics can easily lead to the creation of toxic relationships.In general, people who suffer from this complex tend to live on co-dependent relationships. In the majority of cases, this is one of the worst types of relationship that can exist.
In these relationships, one of the individuals constantly needs the help of the other to feel good.He thinks he can not live without this person.The savior, he, feels stronger thanks to the dependence of his / her spouse. But after a while, it will eventually get bored and feel limited by the need of the other.
Thus, in a co-dependent couple formed by the savior's syndrome,none of the members are really happy.The person addicted to love will have less and less self-esteem and self-confidence while the other feels stifled and blames his / her spouse.
It must be emphasized that this dynamic does not only occur in relationships. It is possible to see it appear between friends, family members, coworkers … However,it usually takes place in the field of romantic relationships.
How to avoid this dynamic
You will now find a series of keys that will help you avoid forming co-dependent relationships. If you think that, to a certain extent, you suffer from this savior's syndrome,to apply them to your life can be of great help to you.
- Remember that youyou are responsible only for yourself.Each person must take the reins of his own life, his emotions and his actions. You do not have to save people if it does not make you happy.
- Learn to say no.For many people, refusing to do what a loved one asks them to do is extremely difficult. However, not doing so inevitably leads to addiction and resentment. Dominating techniques such as assertiveness can therefore enormously help you improve your relationships.
- Set limits.If you have characteristics related to the savior's complex, it surely means that you like to help others. You must know how far you can go. Is there anything you do not particularly like? When does helping others become too much for you?
- Your happiness is your priority.We have always grown up with the idea that caring for one's own well-being before that of others is a little selfish. But if an action will make you unhappy, making it does not make sense. If you really want to help, try to find a way to do it by avoiding suffering.
Ultimately, if you want to free yourself from the savior's syndrome,you must examine yourself in a completely honest way.Only by doing so and remembering that you are responsible for your happiness can you create and maintain relationships that bring you well-being.