According to science, stable couples do not have more intimacy, it's quite the opposite. Couples who enjoy the bed together promote affection and fidelity. Some studies report that frequent sex allows couples to be more stable. The answer lies, among others, in chemistry.
These studies point to the fact that frequent sex practice unites couples more for a purely chemical reason, because of the oxytocin that occurs in our body during excitement and orgasm. A study carried out by the University of Bonn (Germany) showed that this hormone stimulated contact between couples. Through sexual intercourse, high levels of oxytocin can be maintained by improving the emotional relationship and reinforcing the bonds of monogamy.
Oxytocin is the hormone of love and attachment for this reason. For the sexologist Joserra Landarroitajauregi, "Evolution has introduced this substance where the link is important ": during childbirth and breastfeeding, thus strengthening the bond between the mother and the children and during the erotic pleasure, producing a real connection between the lovers.
"If sex was the most important thing in life, Genesis would not start there."
Is love better when there is sex?
According to several surveys conducted in different Western places, a couple has an average of two to three sexual relations a week. The more the couple's sexual relations are frequent and satisfying, the more the emotional union and commitment to each other are important.
Experts argue that sex has three main functions in a romantic relationship: erotic function, reproductive function and communicative function. Ultimately, love is not better when there is frequent sex, but erotic relationships increase attachment and love. Sex does not only provide pleasure, it also mobilizes feelings and emotions by desiring proximity and intimacy with the partner.
"Eroticism is one of the basics of self-knowledge, as indispensable as poetry."
If love is based solely on passion, the relationship has an expiration date
We have discussed the fact that frequent and satisfying sex in couples establishes a stronger emotional union and safer commitment. However, sex and passion are not the only markers of success in a relationship.
Sex is one of the fundamental pillars of the couple, but it is not everything. Mutual admiration is also necessary. Admiration is a central element in any human relationship, at any level, but in a couple it is one of the most important pillars for the proper functioning of the relationship.
A healthy, rewarding, stimulating and enjoyable relationship is associated with a significant dose of mutual admiration. This feeling, associated with intimacy, makes it possible to create a unique and authentic bond that satisfies desires and needs like no other relationship can.
The other basic pillar of sentimental relationships is dialogue and communication. To practice a good dialogue, it is necessary to respect the speaking time, practice active listening and avoid personal reproaches and complaints. In fact,The values that must guide the couple's dialogue are personal honesty and with each other.
But he is also fundamental to think of the common good of the couple before the individual interest without ever setting aside our own identity. In the same way that the sexual relations must be frequent and satisfactory, the communication and the dialogue in the couple must follow the same parameters.