” I am the specter of the shadow that I have been, the trace of the distance that my detours have marked, and I pursue my path without understanding the purpose of life. Who brought us here?
The years pass and I change according to the wind, according to my success. And the more I need it, the more I pray. I cling to the poster, to the guide, to the pillar that supports my weight, without realizing that I push it down to the ground in the hard, cold earth.
Mornings become giants and nights become endless. If only I could have the energy of a comet, even if I would simply be content with its drag.
PWhy does destiny make us suffer? And the saddest, why does my destiny push me to make others suffer? Maybe I should be alone in my corner … But my selfishness prevents me, I need arms to protect myself, heartbeats to warm me, and feel the breath of words of a friend.
Suffering, I was taught to avoid it, to flee it, to refuse it. However, she always comes back stronger and does not abandon me … She clings.
Suffering, bitter suffering, I do not love you, leave me, go away!
Suffering, bitter suffering, why do not you leave me alone?
I was taught not to think about it, always to find a solution. I was taught to take medicine, apply ointments and a thousand other remedies. I was told to ignore it, to focus on something else, to run away from it as one would flee the devil himself. "
Sometimes, perhaps even often, this inner dialogue of a person who suffers may seem familiar to us. Whether suffering is physical or moral, our culture teaches us to run away from it and seek a solution at all costs.
We sometimes abuse drugs. However this solution only hides, patch up and put away what really scares us.
The modern society in which we live does not accept sufferingshe considers it unnatural, and that's where a problem arises. It denaturalises it and transforms it into an enemy that we must flee and not into something natural.
Some physical problems have a solution, others do not. In some cases, medications are needed, but in others we may become addicted. Finally, sometimes, their side effects can cause even more pain than what we were already suffering before.
And for psychic problems? The pains of the spirit …? What to do ? Faced with emotional ill-being there is no pill, no therapy, no cure, nothing that can relieve them. And the more we try to escape them, that is to say, the more we try not to think about it, the more they reappear even more intense.
Faced with suffering, you may choose to flee, this is what modern new therapies call "avoidance syndrome", a case in which a person adds to pain other feelings such as sadness, anxiety, bitterness and boredom.
However, if this situation leaves us defenseless … Is there nothing to do? We must perceive suffering not as something unnatural or as something to flee, but as a natural element of life.
Here is the second option: to look at this suffering in the eyes, without making judgments of value, perceiving it as it is, without hindsight, with attention, without words or emotions, simply by observing it and drawing lessons.
In other words, learning that suffering is only sufferingand that it depends only on how we deal with it, either by undergoing it, or by accepting it as an inevitable part of life.
The suffering is similar to the tides: it comes and goes. So, learn to live with, not by submitting yourself, or staying defenseless, but by accepting and actively fighting for your life.
To defeat her, do not run away from her, but face her. Although it is often difficult, and even if it terrifies us, we must also learn to live with it, and to take advantage of the present moment and all the beautiful things that life offers us.
It is when you walk away from her, without running away from her, that you will begin to suffer less and less.
"And with her I ended up learning, although at first I did not know how to appreciate her, she trained me as a person … and I grew up"
Photo courtesy of Leon Chong.