Self-esteem is the starting point for the fulfillment of a person who realizes that it is important to be responsible for one's own life. (Viktor Frankl)
What is self-esteem?
"The way we look at ourselves has a great impact on all areas of our lives, the way we respond to events depends on how we feel about ourselves." The dramas of our lives are a reflection the self-esteem is the key to success … but also to failure.
Of all the opinions we have, none counts more than ours. Positive self-esteem is the sinquanone condition of a fulfilling life. " (Nathaniel Branden)
Theself esteem, it's here valorization of self ; it is the capacity to love oneself, to respect oneself and to value oneself, which implies a whole series of behaviors that constitute our personal identity; it's a evaluative perception of oneself, one of the main pillars on which one relies.
Self-esteem is composed of two main elements: the feeling of personal ability and the feeling of personal worththat is to say, the sum of all the trust we give and all the respect we have for ourselves, which conditions the quality of our life.
A strong self-esteem allows us to accept our limits and our difficulties, because we love ourselves as we are, with our successes and our failures. It's about feeling good because we love each other, we accept each other, we appreciate each other and we respect each other, regardless of the events that can happen in our lives, what we can not do, and what we do not like.
Self-esteem and the eyes of others
What importance should be given to others? Can we believe everything that others say about us?
Most of the problems that arise in our relationships are due to the image of ourselves that others make us have, understand and accept.
However, if we do not learn to judge others' eyes at its true valueour self-esteem can greatly suffer.
Every relationship is different; the connections that we have with our mother are not the same as those we may have with one of our best friends or co-workers, for example.
In other words, we behave differently with people according to the links we have forged with each person and the role we play in the relationship.
Our personality does not manifest itself in the same way according to the people with whom we are. Relationships with people are only part of ourselves, a small portion, and by no means a whole.
Indeed, others can only know certain facets of ourselves; they do not have access to all our reactions, to all our intimate motivations, nor to our history as a whole. People's personality is not just about relationships with them.
The way others look at us is only built from what they have seen and the importance that each gives to these observations according to their character, and the same goes for the look that we focus on others.
Sometimes, what others like about us may not match what we love about ourselves. Often, we think that what we say about others is totally true, and that what others think about us is just as true, but we are wrong, because the look that the others are about us, it is onlya part of ourselves, not a whole.
Although it depends on the relationship, the amount of time spent with the person and the behavior of the self but also the other in the relationship, people can have more or fewer facets of ourselves.
Nobody can know you better than yourself. Therefore, if you have high self-esteem, you expect nothing from others, since the feeling of self-worth only depends on what you think of ourselves, and not on the partial vision of others. .