Let's learn to take the reins of our life

Let's learn to take the reins of our life

Did you readMetamorphosisKafka? In this novel, a young man wakes up one morning transformed into a sort of cockroach. We ourselves are waiting for a magical act:we want to wake up one morning and all our problems are solved.That would be the ideal, would not it? But this thought is not very functional. The best plan is totake the reins of our life.

"One day, everything will eventually change for the better", "everything will improve, you will see" … How many times have we repeated these types of sentences? For a strange reason, when life is not going well, we tend to think that an external event will shake things up. That something will change the current trend and that everything will be better. We seem to be convinced that all the problems will eventually be solved, as if by magic. However,things do not work that way.You must keep one thing in mind:your life depends on you.

"Happiness is not a ready thing, it comes from your own actions."

-Dalai Lama-

A big secret

Another big secret is that lifedo not solve themselves.If we want to take the reins of our life, it involves putting our own. I knew many people who wanted to leave a relationship or end an uncomfortable situation but were unable to make decisions. I also know many who complain about the bad things that happen to them but that are not able to see their role in this game. In the news of Franz Kafka, everything seems to happen by magic but, in reality, it is not is not the case.

When this type of situation starts to appear regularly, we can face the concept of victimization, through whichwe tend to think that we are victims of everything that happens around us.We are not aware of the power we have in our hands and blame what happens to us (or our misfortune) on external events. This is undoubtedly one of the most harmful postures we can adopt.

If you repeatedly complain with phrases like "bad things happen to me" or use similar phrases as if they were mantras every time something negative happened to you,you will only be able to reach one result: to end up believing that it is true, whereas it is not the case.You will become the passive agents of your life, that is, people without capacity for action. We all go through different situations, sometimes better, sometimes worse and adverse events can affect us successively (or favorable events).

Much of life depends on how we decide to manage it.And this, even if things are very bad. There are people who, in the face of adversity, continue to display a huge smile and others who prefer to use negativity and hostile gestures towards themselves, others and everything around them. .You have the power to choose to live with serenity, whatever happens,or live with a high level of anxiety and frustration.

That the change begins

In Buddhism, there is a term whose description could fill hundreds of pages but which, to summarize, corresponds to the Law of Cause and Effect. Yes, this is Karma. According to this concept,if you plant a positive seed, you will be able to pick positive fruits.

But what does karma have to do with change in our life? It is very simple.Those who want a change must take action.No external thing will come to save you. You can invest all the energy that you waste to dream of a better life in the path of a new path. You can take the reins of your life. Because this new path depends only on you and no one else.If you start sowing seeds of change, this will happen.

Change is not a snap, it requires effort. We are not all ready to change. But we can not pretend to change lives without changing things in our daily lives. For years we have acted in a concrete way; this leads to patterns of behavior that are deeply rooted in us. What does that mean? That we always try to solve problems in the same way, even if we often see that it does not work.

Have you ever had classmates who failed their exams while they were studying? We all know cases of people who went out of their way using the same methods when they did poorly. They think they have not made sufficient efforts while the problem lies elsewhere.If you study a lot but are stuck, where can the problem be? In the method.That's what we need to work. We need to change the point of view and the method through which we want to achieve our goals.

Taking the reins of your life involves action, effort and awareness.

The first steps to take the reins of our life

The first step to take the reins of our life is toanalyze what we want to change.What aspects of our life would we like to improve? It is very important to be sincere with ourselves. We tend to dive into self-deception and deception not to recognize our flaws or not to work on the necessary aspects. But it's a mistake. Sincerity is essential. It's also work that we do internally, so we do not need to talk to anyone about it.

The second step is toobserve what we have done so that things continue to happen in the same way.What strategies have we adopted? Why do we always achieve the same result? Why have we not experienced change on the point we would like to see change? We must observe whether our tendency has been to repeat the same strategies. If so, it's time to change.

The third point to take the reins of our life, which is almost more important than the two previous ones, is toovercome our fear.Fear is a necessary primary emotion that can save our life in case of danger. But when it extends to everyday life, it begins to represent a problem. This emotion tends to paralyze us and trap us in our comfort zone. We prefer to keep feeling bad rather than facing something new. Why? Because we are afraid of what could happen to us or are afraid of having to leave some aspects of our life behind us.

And if, instead of sitting on your sofa and waiting for life to change, you get up and start changing it yourself? Trust yourself. I assure you that you will quickly see results you never imagined.To travel a thousand kilometers, you have to start by taking a step.

There are people who fear changes, I'm afraid things never change

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