“To change our outer life, we must first change the interior. From the moment we want to change, it's fascinating to see how the universe is starting to help us.”– Louise Hay –
Leave without leaving an address … An idyllic choice?
Every year, thousands of people choose to change their lives, leave their homes or move away from their families.
Others are still hesitant to do so, because of their responsibilities, the fear of the unknown and the existential emptiness.
Why do these people want to disappear? How do they rebuild their lives without ties to their past? What are the consequences of abandoning those around them?
Even if at first sight the idea of "leaving everything" and "starting all over again" can be rather attractive for some people, the reality is quite different.
Indeed, it is extremely difficult to rebuild a life filled with new conditions.
Deciding on such a radical change without working on some of the basics of the story and the personality of each one will only increase the feeling of drifting and repetition of the same patterns of conduct that have previously brought so much misery.
The most common reasons why some people choose to break with their past are:
- The fear of commitment
- Excess of responsibilities (acquired or imposed)
- The feeling of not finding meaning to his life
- Being bad about yourself
- Some traumas
- Difficulties in the family
- Economic crisis
- End harmful affective relationships
- The quest for emotions
- The desire to go further in his work
- The desire to regain control of one's life
- The search for anonymity, the desire to free oneself from labels
Change your life without completely cutting bridges
"The greatest discovery of my generation is that human beings can transform their lives by changing their state of mind"– William James –
Changing lives without completely breaking down the bridges and breaking with everything is a choice that has less impact and a greater guarantee of stability.
Many individuals dream of leaving everything but do not and choose to opt for a less drastic change.
– These people are motivated by the same reasons that push others to radical change, but they consider that this does not have to involve all their professional and family environment.
– They begin to explore new horizons, try to do different activities, to meet new people and not to frequent the same places as before.
– In the context of work, they seek to evolve, to change sector or geographical location. If this is not possible, they can opt for a change of work, without changing the domain completely.
– Faced with emotional difficulties, they can choose to get help from a professional individually as part of a couple or family therapy.
– If they end up ending a relationship, maintaining a few emotional bonds while breaking the bonds of life together, is a more balanced decision for themselves and for others.
Your way of changing your life affects your immediate surroundings
Everyone has the right to change their life if it does not suit him. However, taking into account the feelings of those in your family, social and professional circle can make a real difference in making these changes.
Indeed, it will determine the intensity of the impact that your change of life will have on your environment:
- For people who are abruptly abandoned, this decision of the loved one can prove to be a truly traumatic event.
- Indeed, these people do not just question the departure, but they begin to question themselves with feelings of guilt and anxiety present.
- They do not feel a sensible form of suffering, but a feeling of pain, the feeling of not being able to forget, an irreparable mystery filled with doubts and reproaches.
Thus, changing your life in a way that would imply a total abandonment of loved ones in your eyes, without giving any explanation, generates a double penalty: the departure, but especially the abandonment.
You try to do the least possible harm, even if you think that your break and your departure are justified …