Have you ever been in a relationship where you felt attacked by seemingly innocent attitudes?
Have you ever felt that someone close to you used this attitude to get what he wants? We invite you to read this article to learn more about this attitude.
What is the aggressive passive attitude?
The aggressive passive attitude can take many forms, although they all represent verbal aggression or negative behavior.
It usually happens when we are angry, sad or disappointed by someone to whom we want to show our true feelings.
It is a form of psychological abuse because it causes great pain and emotional harm to people we love.
Identify the aggressive passive attitude
The aggressive passive attitude occurs when certain negative behaviors persist in a relationship.
Attitudes can take the following forms :
– A lack of communicationwhen there is a problematic situation that needs to be mentioned.
– Avoid or ignore the person with whom it is not possible to speak calmly.
– Elude problems, topics and situations that need to be solved.
– Give priority to less important topics and postpone the most important ones.
– Hinder or sabotage events or processes that generate change in your favor.
– Avoid situations in which you can lose or meet someone with whom to compete.
– Being ambiguous and unclear in conversations with others.
– Maintain an attitude of bad mood, silence and resentment with the aim of attracting attention and generating sympathy.
– The fear of maintaining close relationships.
– Give an apology for not doing things, without assuming responsibility.
– Victimization andinabilityto recognize its share of responsibility in the problems.
Depending on the person and the situation, all or some of these characteristics may occur.
Where does the aggressive passive attitude come from?
The aggressive passive attitude is a defense mechanism by which one claims to achieve emotional protection.
It is an automatic attitude that derives from past negative experiences that have deeply affected us.
The causes of this attitude are fears, resentment, disillusionment, insecurities and lack of self-esteem.
Learn to deal with an aggressive passive attitude
If you have an aggressive passive attitude and want to changeyou should start by understanding the causes.
Then, it will be easier for you to hold on before initiating this attitude. However, if you relapse, you will have to take responsibility for your actions and reactions.
You should also avoid feeling attacked when dealing with your problems. Instead, try to keep an objective view.
If you have to deal with an aggressive passive person, try to understand the reasons for this attitude and to let the other person know that it affects you.
Prepare to be assaulted but do not assume the role of the victim who feels guilty. Try to be honest with yourself about your responsibility for the situation and if it continues, set clear limits.