What to do with the memories we have built? And with the desire to keep trying everything for the relationship to work? How to evaluate the time we gave to this other person, the one who represented everything for us and who decided to say goodbye?What to do with the love we always feel?How to face a breakup in love that fell on us suddenly?
Ending a relationship is not pleasant, especially if we have not made that decision ourselves.The memories, the nostalgia and the sadness begin to invade us and, with all this, questions like those we have just asked ourselves. Without wanting to, we can plunge into a spiral of carelessness and uneasiness. A kind of immobility that leaves us wanting to act.
A break symbolizes a loss, a mourning, an end, unexpected or, at least, unwanted, which leaves us alone face a future that we see as uncertain.Share
Breakups are complicated for the person who did not make the decision, but not impossible to overcome.Believing that one will never be happy again and that one will never meet anyone again is usual in such situations. However, it is only doubts and insecurities that are the result of disappointment and suffering. Moreover, these feelings are part of the process to go through in order to heal.
What to do when the end point of a relationship appears? The best option, even if it seems a little contradictory, is to do nothing.That is to say, let the process follow its natural course.It is normal to need a break, a period to think and for this, nothing like solitude and calm. Only in this way will we be able to achieve proper, sincere and sometimes painful introspection.
Once we connect to our inner selves, the next step will beto open up to the emotions we feel.These can be varied: rage, sadness, hate … The essential thing is to listen to them to gradually release them, answer our questions and face our fears. However, it must be known that this is not done in one, two or three days. Nor in a week. This process is slow. We must be prepared and be aware of it. Its duration will depend on the person who lives it.
What do we do with all these memories?
What to do with all that we have lived with the other person? Nothing. We must not do anything special.The breakup is part of the path we need to move forward. Memories belong to us, they represent experiences that we absolutely must not lose. They are part of who we are.They may hurt us at the beginning of the process. It's normal. We thought there would be no end. But they are there and, over time, we will be able to give them space and the place they deserve. A kind of little box that, when we open it, will generate controllable and healthy emotions.
Sometimes we try to speed up the process and look for immediate answers. But by doing that, we may be backing away.It takes time for the emotions to change.If we let things take their course, they will resolve themselves, little by little. Of course, the relationship has not been too toxic or tormented. So when we leave space for reason, we may realize that not everything was so wonderful. And that the end of the relationship was perhaps the best thing possible.
Offering our time to someone who does not love us anymore or who prefers to do nothing with us allows us to be alone to get to know each other better, take care of ourselves and perhaps meet someone ready to accompany us. When the storm is over and the emotions have calmed down, when we learn to listen and give ourselves time, we will realize thatit is not an end but the beginning of a new stage.
How long can one suffer after a break?
The pain resulting from a breakup depends on each person.There is no fixed term. The more we try not to think, not to remember the past, to do a thousand things not to be alone or to suppress our tears, the more we will delay this process. Let's not forget that crying this loss and being alone is fundamental to closing this story and healing. We need to regain strength to rebuild ourselves.
"Saying goodbye to someone you do not want to let go hurts, but asking him to stay while he wants to leave is even worse."Share
Time and good management of emotions allow us to overcome a breakup in love.Nevertheless, if the state of apathy and sadness is maintained over time, we recommend that you consult a specialist.