To educate is to transmit, guide, show and teach our children what we consider important in life.
In this education are our values, our ideas and our expectations of life, our habits, our ways of living and seeing life.
Parents always intend to pass on the best to their children, but the intention is not everything. You also need to know how to pass it on, because you may not be able to do this, failing the education you wanted to give your children.
Impose or accompany?
There are so many ways to educate that there are people, and one of them passes through authority, coercion, punishment, and obedience.
In this form of education children are "trained", and parents transmit values through fear and authority.
Most of the time, the smaller ones obey, without learning or thinking, simply to avoid the negative consequences that might occur if they do not obey.
However, there is another approach, combining respect and support of the child in its evolution.
This approach teaches and transmits to the child the why of things and allows him to understand the demands of the greatest.
Often, learning is done through experience, trying to find an agreement, to negotiate and to promote autonomyso that the little ones become responsible for their small decisions and their consequences.
Are standards and limits adequate?
Respecting and accompanying the evolution and maturation of our little ones does not mean that they must direct their own education.
We must not forget that parents are still the driving force and guides in the education of their children. Thus, it is the parents who mark the path of learning that they wish to show their children.
For this, it is important to clearly articulate the norms and boundaries that define the margins of what you want to teach, as it is obvious that everything must be clear to your little ones.
How to educate with respect?
It is important to see clearly and stick to what you want to teach. For this, it is essential to know your values, those you want to transmit with security and consistency.
So, to educate your children is to transmit values through everyday norms and habits, clearly explaining what you do not want them to do.
Teaching values is something natural and spontaneous, which is transmitted from generation to generation, through observation, imitation, and above all, through non-verbal language.
This means that what you expect from your children, you have to let them know with your attitudes, your emotions and your feelings, approving or disapproving and explaining the direct consequences of all this.
Safe parents, emotionally healthy children
Children become emotionally healthy when they learn to live their own lives,with the accompaniment and protection of their elders, understanding and resolving conflicts and coping with difficulties, just as their parents taught them.
When the child becomes a teenager, and later adult, he will decide whether to apply what he has learned. However, there is no doubt that a good education will be the best luggage to pass on for his journey in life.
The safest children are those who have evolved in the communication and trust of their elders, through which they have become able to understand why their parents conveyed these specific values to them.
It is therefore important to accompany them to become mature and autonomous, and to teach them how to manage their emotions frustration, rage, anger, jealousy …
You must value their progress, successes, successes, abilities and skills, always showing them the love, tenderness and affection you feel for them.