New types of relationships flood the social sphere.Polyamor, open relationships and relational lawlessness are just some examples of the most innovative relationships. Recently, a new term has arisen. It goes further than the ones we just mentioned and pushes us to think. This is agamia.
This concept first appeared in 2014.He abandons the idea ofgamos(union, marriage) to focus on a new social and relational model.Those who support this idea advocate a defense that goes beyond free love (but without feeling of exclusive need).
Agamia refuses that a certain stereotype of relationship, romantic or amorous, submits people.She defends the non-establishment of models of relationship.
From this point of view, the concept of love prevailing in our society is understood as an ideological subsystem. This one serves the patriarchal interestsand class. This means that this feeling has been imposed to us as a form of alienation by the system in order to control us. We are pushed to wish the same thing. To consider ancient definitions that turn us into slaves and make us unhappy as logical.
Many practitioners of agamia do it out of disillusionment. Some flee relationships because of the toxicity they have unfortunately experienced.Jealousy, Possession, Abuse and Asphyxiating Addictionare often the dangerous symptoms of a love that is not really one.
Otherwise,some prefer to enjoy full autonomy. While being free to live their sexuality as they see fit.Most critics say this is dangerous for the survival of traditional love. Analyzing the basic principles of agamie can help us understand this new social model.
The substitution of sexuality by eroticism
From the point of view of agamia, sex is not seen as something sacred and exclusive to relationships (whether monogamous or polygamous).It is a natural and healthy thing that must be experienced with a form of self-love and freedom.
Agamia substitutes sexuality with eroticism.It is therefore the germ of new types of non-specific relationships that go beyond heterosexuality. Thus, one must never do something that one does not want. And even less feel obliged to do it.
A renunciation of love and oppression
From this point of view, romantic love and its idealization are a chimera. Jealousy, possessiveness and obsession have no place among rational human beings. These negative feelings hurt us and diminish our well-being.The agamie aims to break away from the emotions of exclusivity. She puts on a harmonious sociability.
So,oppression should never be linked to the concept of love.Reason, common sense and natural impulses take precedence over siren songs and dramas.
Alternatives to the traditional family
Agamie proposes a redefinition of the idea of family.She considers it "a group of individuals with consensual relations of eroticism, a company and a confluence of interests". Moreover, from the point of view of agamia, fatherhood means much more than having a child. Love, respect and tenderness are the only things to judge when assessing the capacity of a father / mother.
The followers of this philosophyflee social conventionalism. They want to form a family that adapts to their needs.
"No one can belong to anyone else, love is a free contract that starts with a spark and can end in the same way."
This is not polyamor
Polyamory defends the idea that we can have one or more relationships. Some may be more stable than others.Agamie rejects the concept of a couple because he considers it empty and unrealistic.It has nothing to do with polyamor, sex without engagement or sporadic relationships. Agamia is much more complex.
Over time, relationships with people we know become critical. This philosophy allows us to establish any type of connection with the individuals around us. Any label or definition becomes superfluous.
Agamia, more than an ideology or a form of life, presents us with a recurring theme:how to live relationships.Even if we avoid this term, contact with other people involves establishing a relationship. Denying it will not make this reality disappear. We can always respect the way they define themselves and connect people to each other.