A few months ago was virally shared the story of ateenager who asked her mother for apology because she arrived late in class.The mother, probably surprised by the ease of her daughter, argued his originality by justifying the delay of the latter by an evil called "teenager".
The mother, Nicole Poppic, published on social networks the word she wrote for her daughter, justifying her delay in this way:"This is what happens when you arrive late because of your bad decisions and ask me to write you a word to justify it."
The word she wrote to her daughter Clara said the following:"Clara arrives late this morning because of an illness known as adolescentitis.It affects millions of adolescents in the country and no cure is known at the moment.There are many symptoms, but this morning in particular, she was unable to get out of bed and also felt the need to respond to her mother … (…) Please warn me if you are witnessing another crisis ".
"Adolescence is a rebirth because with it are born more complete and higher human traits".
Teenage is the beginning of the metamorphosis
The psychologist Stanley Hall is considered a pioneer in the study of adolescence as an evolutionary step. He described adolescence as a second birth during whicha sort of recapitulation of infantile experiences occurs, together with a series of crises and learning.
Adolescence is a stage that takes place between the ages of 12-20 years, during which a great deal of change takes place that is not only physical but also cognitive, emotional and existential. Teenagers therefore tend to ask how the world works and what their role is in the world.
This assumes a real revolution at all levelsbecause boys and girls, during this period, are immersed in an emotional and cognitive roller coaster that drives them to behave in a "revolutionary" way.
The rebellion of the hormones and the change of socio-emotional position is what justifies the fact that the world sees this stage as a teenager.Share
One of the most common questions parents ask is, if the teenager already seems to have the ability to think like an adult, he or she does not act as such. This question has a clear answer: cognitive maturity and emotional maturity do not go together.
This is why we tend to consider that, in many aspects,the adolescent is still emotionally immature: it is defined as fluctuating, explosive and full of temperament(characteristics that usually make us talk about adolescentitis). Nevertheless, we must know that it is thanks to this cognitive maturity or thought that we are able to initiate the search for an identity or a personal essence.
Usually, the adolescent has developed his emotional abilities and these are equivalent to that of an adult. However, even if he benefits,he does not have the experience of the adult and therefore focuses mainly on the analysis of the emotional world which he must absorb a very large dose.
Often, in the midst of this particular emotional whirlwind, the adolescent assiduously displays negative emotional states and high-intensity emotions that he confuses because they manifest together.Share
This emotional activation involves such an overload that the adolescent, at first, fails to make sense of many of his emotions.However, we must consider that all these experiences will help him to understand the complex tandem of his emotions, thoughts, actions and psychosocial situation.
Three factors that explain complex family relationships during adolescence
Millions of parents around the world will certainly feel identified with the situation we were talking about at the beginning of the article and what we calladolescentite.Teenage sons or daughters, in their quest to maintain a rebellious attitude, engage in a rebellion against norms established by the progenitors or the society itself.
It must be remembered that, for the teenager too, it is a very confusing stepbecause he can not find himself while he searches for himself continuously by reinventing himself and changing. The stability shines through its absence and, therefore, we do not see the light at the end of the tunnel.
The complexity of family relationships during adolescence can be explained by three delimited factors (by excluding individual differences):
1. Conflicts with parents and their position in society
At a certain point in this stage, very often,teenagers are treated like children when asked to behave like adults,thus ruining in a certain way the vision of maturity and certainty that they have of themselves and perpetuating a state of conflict between themselves and society.
This, at present, is constituted as a phenomenon that we can call the desynchronization. In fact, personal developments occur in an increasingly precocious way while the integration of the person in the adult and professional world is done more and more later. This prolongs adolescence and very often aggravates family conflicts.
2. Alterations in mood
The adolescent is, by definition, emotionally fluctuating.His mood changes are more abrupt and he has moods more extreme and more negative than usual. If asked throughout the day, they experience more negative feelings than adults and pre-teens.
On the other hand, the adolescent is even more fluctuating, intense and negative if he does not enjoy a certain popularity in his peer group, has poor academic results or if family conflicts such as divorce take place.Adolescence, even if we take into account individual differences, is a stage with great possibilities of being"emotionally complicated".
3. Risk behaviors
Adolescents, with their thirst for acting against established norms, are more easily involved in illegal, anti-social, reckless or, ultimately, risky behavior. Nevertheless,in contrast to family conflict and mood changes, risk behaviors are more likely during late adolescence and early adulthood.
This is something that is explained by impulsiveness and the tendency to seek new sensations. These two factors, along with those previously discussed, help us understand that we are facing a critical period that requires supervision and assistance (at a careful and variable distance depending on the circumstances, it must be said) responsible for the minor.
We need to keep in mind that adolescence is a stage in which we are immersed in our surroundings and the environment: adults must pay attention to these. There is no magic wand that can help us manage this step but, if one thing is certain, even if it may seem strange, it is thatAdolescence involves family-level preparation that resembles the one when a baby arrives at home.